Side Note: This was meant to be a quick midweek post to share some of the amazing changes thats happening for us right now. But what with this being my girl’s birthday week and all, things are downright crazy. Also having people in and out of your home fixing things that break at such lousy times makes you lose touch with the whole date-time continuim. So much so this post never saw the light of day. But I’m pushing it out the nest anyway! Because instead of getting started on party prep, I wrote this instead. So, hell yeah, its going out!
Time to hitch those big panties up real high and toight, I’ve got some big life stuff happening right now!
And I mean big! Well, to me they are big…Wait, no…No, this really is some major life stuff things happening here. Any way I slice it. Some days it feels like just too much to actually juggle..and like I’m getting nowhere as it is. And am I a nutter for even thinking of taking all this on. Especially when I know how many times I’ve dropped all those juggled balls in the recent past. But then I remember all the other times I’ve dropped the ball, and oh, look – life went on! And I got all those balls back into the air, and then some!
So, first up…hold onto your socks …(are you holding ‘em?)…I watched a baby come into this world for the first time! Yes! A baby! Like it wasn’t mine… And it’s so different when it’s not you giving birth…its just amazing to bear witness to. An honour in fact!
There’s just so much to process, that I’m still processing it – because yes, I watched one of this life’s greatest miracles happen right before my eyes, but also because it also wasn’t all positive…There was a lot of deep heartache for what I witnessed that mama go through. So lots of emotions still swirling inside my head about it. I stood in as a last minute doula for a lady I had just met. And to be able to cradle her and support her through all that, was just an immense honour.
Watching that baby come earthside, though…watching her “become” a mother…just floods you with all the humility and respect for the divine miracle of life. Cannot wait to share more of that…But like I said, still processing it. However, this has propelled me towards another great itch under my skin: to become a qualified doula. But that’s a story for another time…
Then, on that same note and towards another holy moses moment for me:…Wait for it…I just started my new business! I am now a HypnoBIrthing Practitioner! Like pinch me, already!
Anyone who knows me very well, knows how passionate I am about birth, and about more importantly, how passionate I am about empowering moms AND dads with knowledge to help them approach birth confidently and joyfully and be able to make informed decisions – no matter which way things go. So long story short, after learning the HypnoBirthing techiques myself for Parker-Grace’s birth, this was definitely something I knew I wanted to do. To help inform and empower other parents about birth – that incredible and fleeting moment that is only granted to us just “only so many times” in this life.
Of course I had no idea how I was going to fit it into my already jam-packed lifestyle. I mean, I already have a demanding full-time executive job that often requires late nights and research time that can go well into the midnight hours many a time; A small, young family that needs my undivided attention, time and effort – these two little girls of mine are only going to be little for so long and I’m not willing to miss any of it. Like, not even a little. I also have a darling husband that needs and deserves his wife to be present, bringing my 100% to this relationship. As well as being pregnant, wanting to get the home ready for this little Coconut of ours. So much to prep in terms of the home, psychologically for myself and getting our girls ready for their new sibling, as well as birth prep. And by birth prep, I mean, the physical stuff of getting our home prepped for the big day, as well as mentally being present for that auspicious day baby decides to make her debut…Not to mention this blog, which often for certain pieces also requires some research to ensure rigour within the facts.
So…*breathe*… how I’m thinking I can squeeze in a new business as well? Fonk sei yook, guys, I actually don’t know, but I’m doing it. I am fueled by great passion for this, and it won’t let me rest, lest I just do it. And I know there is more in this line. More in me. To give. I have so much more I want to study, grow myself in and qualify in to go out and help other moms out there. I also have a hankering to go back and do another degree in my field of IT, but that’s where I grab myself by the proverbial collars and go “whoa nelly!”..first get through this. Step by step.
So yes, it’s step by step. But, either way, I’m freaking excited!Maybe I’ll share more about my business later on this blog. But that’s later, I think.
Then also in more birth related news – guys….this homebirth thing that mentioned up there and that I told you about a few weeks ago..Im so over the freakin moon, it’s nuts. Also, yes, I am aware that Im starting abuse the word freakin in this post. But I write like I talk, so forgive me, there’s loads of excitement in this post, and “freakin’” is my go-to politically correct expletive.
I’m so excited about it that I’ve done exactly nothing in that line of prepping. Like complete paralysis. Ever happen to you? Happening to me right now. I’ve got about 2 months left to do it all but still, we know how time creeps up on us.
Then in more current events, my eldest…my first born, the one who lifted the veil on motherhood for me….Morgan-Lee is turning six this Friday.(edit:That’s today!) A whole freaking- fragging six! Menaing, I’ve been at this mothering for a few solid years….and with that I can confidently say that no matter how long you do this, you’ll never actually feel like a pro. I mean, yeah, you’ll get those great days…or weeks..and you’ll ride them like exhilarating waves feeling like you’re totally winning at this motherhood thing…till you wipe out, of course. Like face plant. Hard. On that sandpapery shore. But yeah, right now Im more in the build-up phase of this current wave. And watching this little 5-almost-6 year old of mine walk around, speaking the wisdom and comedy she does, makes me feel like it’s a good one. It’s a wave I’m gonna carve it like a pro! Or something like that. But point being, this is big life stuff man…my once rolly polly newborn is now the eldest of my three kids and taking this world on with all her golden heart and genuine charm…and I get to witness it all!
Which of course bring us to: Birthday party planning!! This is usually a big one in and of itself. Mostly because it makes me so annoyingly happy to see my girls so psyched for their party. And of course, party planning is my jam, and brings all shades of happy to my bones. Not to say they don’t come with challenges now and again. Case in point: Obviously my girl chose a theme that was super tricky – like why choose something that mom can just quickly pick up at the store décor wise – you know, party in a box type of vibes. Yeah, why make it easy when instead you can get mom to scratch her brain for how the dickens she’s going to pull it all together. For interest sake, Morgan-Lee chose Penquins of Madagascar…so I’m trying to make it work somehow.
Mostly, Im trying to make it work whilst being preggo and understanding that my output is not the same as when Im not pregnant. But that’s not the big thing, the big thing is this is the FIRST time I’m ever inviting school friends over. I don’t know the mommies and I don’t know the kiddies. But I figured now is as good a time as any…Actually no, I could have waited till a time when Im not pregnant, had more energy….and could drink wine. Because nothing says mothers bonding quite like glasses of chardonnay!
And there’s so much more that’s going on, like the usual things you know? Those things that keep the lights on, and the cogs churning. They seem like small things but in truth none of the big things would be possible without them. So we keep at it.
Very possiby the same attitude I may have to adopt for this particular party I am planning. My back is in spasm, the house is a wreck, I am yet to start on the decor and that cake aint going to bake itself…Whom I kidding, I love this shit. 11th hour is my thang!
So scoot up, pregnancy waddle coming through..big life stuff needs to be handled! 😉